saturday begins like…

saw viggo’s new film last night in the u-district. really good film. really love that viggo. really using key words this morning. not. in. the mood. for sentences. hung out in the u-district and enjoyed myself. felt old feelings, wrote about them in a tea shop. feelings that tug on my heart. nostalgic for a parallel reality, not the past. i don’t want to smoke cigarettes in a cafe while writing sad poems about suffering. but i do miss that feeling. what is that feeling? i cannot pin it with a word. i cannot capture it like a butterfly. we talked social justice a lot last night. white privilege and really owning it. honoring the wound of oppression. not being impatient for healing. allowing for the pain to have its voice for as long as needed. i have so much to say about this but i don’t feel blog is the forum as it’s just my online diary. social justice is on my mind constantly now. i don’t know how to fix what is wrong. i only feel the continual urge to tend to the wound. fixing can feel like an insult. healing is more the honoring protocol and healing is largely about honoring the voice of pain. when fixing enters the realm of healing it loses the feminine balance and wants to make the pain go away. the feminine energy inside all of us knows innately how to give expression to pain. navigating through chronic epidemic power wounds. i know what it’s like to only be what i have been. key words, too many thoughts need key words. scattered and emotional. i need to go for a run and feel the divine coursing through my blood. not sure what else to say right now without going into long explanations. the sky is grey. i love this. finally a rest from the searing sun which i also love. blog feels not so good this morning, i admit. i don’t feel like talking about myself i realize. i want to get outside of myself today. been doing so much self work this past week, traveling through the underworld, i need a break from the excavating. my desire to honor the wounded voice is what rises in my heart today. i believe in the power of love to heal.

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