about to go to the sea trickle…

no dreams about the nagas last night, but i researched them a lot yesterday.  in usual form, i trust my own envisioning, over what i read in books, and came to understand there are many types of nagas, all reptilian…but there are those from the sea, earth, sky, and stars…and those who are more loving toward humanity than others.  was brought back to researching agartha too, the world inside the earth.  by researching i mean, using my clairvoyant window to see.  and the mystery is unfolding.  today i go to the sea, where if i have a naga self, she would be.  just in time too.  feeling city drained.  needing a getaway by home near the water.  speaking of clairvoyant people, i am still reading theosophy, and realizing more and more, how much i don’t vibe with much of it, in my heart.  that’s me.  i simply do not feel any clairvoyant, including myself, can see beyond my own point of evolution and human suit…and i always detect ego when cosmologies are treated as facts.  will continue to rely on the living metaphor and ever evolving storyline, while at the same time, feeling the living presence of consciousness and oneness taking form, being all the beings from the naga to the netaru.  it’s a tight rope walk and falling down means losing a balanced perspective.  i form my cosmological story for fiction, to open the heart, well aware of a deep hunger to know what is really happening beneath all the duping of this human society.  it is what it is.  longing must exist in its pure state.  longing is the treasure, and romance between me and creator.  the naga want me to focus on sexual energy, its healing and creative powers, verses the myth of how they got here.  humans are still filled with so much shame and repression about sexual energy, that most are caught up in aspects that are either about not having it and making rules against it, or having it in a way that’s just pleasure focused, and about releasing a physical sensation. then there are the expressions of naughtiness, forbidden contact, and other such adjectives that are products of shame needing liberation, in my opinion.  feeling naughty is a great way for repressed sexual feelings to be activated while shame is liberated.  if there is not shame, being naughty would not even be a turn on, or a thing.  if the truth about sexual energy is really revealed and expressed, how much more potent, happy, well adjusted, and in love with life we all would be.  how much more connected and healthy?  a ton.  that’s all i will say.  don’t want to sound like a scientist of psychologist here.  gotta just work on my healing powers, for i haven’t in so long.  white cobra reminds me i still need to ground, i am still taking in the energy of others.  i need to learn to not do this.  still the apprentice.  still equals stillness.  the book is changing form too, not sure what it is anymore.  all the pieces have been tossed in the air like confetti.  how it lands, i don’t know.  burning orange and ylang ylang, wearing obsidian around the throat.  surrendered again.  taking every droplet of desire, turning it into art and healing hands.  taking every dream and using it to investigate foreign lands.  can you tell i am still a “the good wife” junkie, by my appropriation of lawyer language?  not seeing, investigating.  not remembering, researching.  not a journey, a case.  it’s fun.  libra energy.  craving justice, beauty, art, diplomacy.  saving face.  calling out for more grace.  loving energy given toward the enemy, those who refuse me, and the human race.  given enough space from being michelle to feel the larger i inside, the oneness not needing pride, being both enemy and ally, disguised as different people.  marrying opposites, per usual.  back down to the ground.  customers.  tools.  yoga.  bring it down and through, be the soul taking form of a me, that is a mirror of you.  this blog is all over the place.  like comets shooting fire.  sea, wash away this fire that cannot be actualized.  a reset button.  moonstone and flourite.  purple and orange.  love washing away disappointment.  not taking it personal as each man says no to me, or i to them.  until mutual love comes marching in, unexpected as they say.  alchemy, my path.  how i love polarizing.  you be this, and i will be that, and we will be different, and i will marry our differences in my heart.  for, you cannot have two seas beside one another…that would be ridiculous.  the sea needs the land.  the earth needs the sun.  blah blah blah, it’s time to come undone.  words like sand castles, wash away in the waves.  naga, my friends, i’ll see you today…