the nagas are here….

last night i slept for nine hours, and dreamed about the nagas coming to me.  had to look up what that meant in the morning.  they are sea beings, filling many mythological tales from the chinese and hindu past.  makes me think of my pal, white cobra…maybe i am being initiated, or brought to a new level, where she is operating from?  i don’t know, but the mystery is unfolding.  their message and the dream had something to do with sexuality, but i cannot recall upon waking.  interesting though, that upon going to sleep my thoughts were about my sexual energy.  no judgement on anybody else’s way or path with sexuality ever or at all…i just understood for me, that i cannot engage sexually without heart.  i cannot separate the two, sex from love.  this is not a moral thing, it is an energetic thing.  for me at this point in my growth and healing, sexuality has gone from being a broken place of suffering and hurt, to the most potent and valuable aspect of my being, the hidden gem, treasure, medicine, power, revitalizer, deluge of love, and the sparkle of my creature being.  i reserve my sexuality for love only, and until it comes around, i rise the sexual energy up my chakras, toward my crown, and back down again into the root, circulating the energy and stirring the forces, to create art and give healing.  so mote it be.  my entire life is ruled by the sexual force it seems.  my first novel is all about sexual tragedy, and the consequences of it on a girl and a boy.  i leave that behind now, and move on to new territory.  the nagas are here for me now, whatever that means.  and when i say, ruling my life, i am being dramatic, just so you know.  for, any chance to create romance, i will, cause life is an epic quest, from these rose colored eyes.  the dream last night was so powerful on my psyche that i feel i have awoken new.  the naga’s medicine is sucking out the poison from my heart, purifying me.  and all i needed to do, to get them to swim to me in dreamtime, was commit to not having sex unless my heart is connected.  i have been in the ashram of that for years now, but i had not made the commitment, and my heart needed the commitment.  apparently so did the nagas.  why am i blogging about this?  because i think i might start blogging more about it.  i’ve always been one to reveal what is hidden and difficult to discuss.  sexual energy is a beautiful and powerful aspect of our humanity, and my perspective i feel compelled to share.  many are compelled to talk about sex from many different angles. some are focused on the freedom to explore kink, polyamory, fantasies, and that whole realm of playful exploration.  this does not interest me.  neither does the morality aspect.  for mutual consent between two adults is the only morality needed.  and i have no interest to fight that battle anymore.  we are allowed to move on, whenever we want.  an old friend once explained to be the power of affirming the positive, instead of affirming the negative.  if you are a regular follower of my blog, you know i am always about seeing both sides, so this is not about one being better than the other.  i have affirmed so much of the negative.  my first book affirmed the negative of not only tragedy from abuse, but also of the way spiritual awakening on youth can create its own form of tragedy.  the female character and the male character each suffered based on their dark and light extremes.  at the time, i needed to reveal that, and i got it out of me.  now, i want to affirm to the positive…in my next book.  i want to explore the mystery of being human, from another angle.  today is a marker of change.  the nagas are here to help, and i am devoted to the path of sacred sexuality now.  this is not a high falooten pie in the sky thing.  only the masculine aspect of spirituality, when out of balance with the feminine, makes it seem high falooten with its rituals, hierarchies, secrets, heavy hearted seriousness, and desire for power.  my way stems from the breath of the innocent, liberated, free soul who feels her way through life poetically.  the masculine energy in me directs, commits, dedicates, and navigates, yet from a place of unconditional love, sweetness, flow, and joy for the experience of being human, even in the suffering.  i am on a destiny kick right now, with destiny being rooted in choice.  i have surrendered my will to the divine, and the divine tells me to choose.  taking extremes and marrying them, is my tao, is the alchemy…is my poetry….so here i come…up from the dark waters, like the nagas…i shall flow…

yet on the outside, i am just a woman living on the hill doing her thing…