full moon taurus drool…

full moon taurus. met friends for a birthday dinner.  felt heavy, dense, like a rock, not much to say, but feeling the love.  at the shop (temple) before hand.  we figured out the taurus full moon is about persistence.  showing up in the now.  so little words.  did not want to listen to the cards.  i’ve had enough.  need to start writing, for sure, beginning with the new moon in sag.  feeling uber sensitive.  in the cafe talking about myth.  masculine and feminine energies.  the yugas.  true love.  have i really let go?  i don’t know what i am saying anymore.  coffee in soda water on ice, with cream, green walls, sharing a plot line from a year ago, and if i ought to revisit it.  this song bursts my heart wide open.  feel home again, soon as i hear it.  i know what love is…i want to show you.  want and not want marry inside.  braiding right and left mind.  oneness is emptiness, ruby told me in a dream last night.  we were hanging out in some ashram place.  i felt it when she said it.  i was trying to convince myself oneness is still an entity.  but with her message, the illusion melted.  was gripped by oneness as emptiness, being me.  felt the preciousness of human form…of emptiness that is oneness, being human form and all forms, for a limited time only.  you are you, so be you, cause it’s fast and short and oneness, which is emptiness, is begging you to not return, because oneness which is emptiness, became you for a reason, and that reason is love.  not parent love, though sometimes it is…mostly lover love, for me anyhow.  the love of oneness being form is bliss…trippin’ on this, full moon…comforted by an everlasting glow…vast microcosmic undying love, the sea…crashing wave of the macrocosmic rises and falls, builds, lives, and dies upon the shore of me…fallen leaf…back down to the ground, all golden, sunset, and brown…so much karma is dying.  painting dead leaves in the morning. leaves are the most beautiful when they die.  in dead pose, listening to saraswati by krishna das after requesting it.  thank you, jill, it was everything and more i thought it would be.  walking to yoga through a sunlit windy crystal, after waking up in a cauldron of stormy darkness.  seattle was very moody today.  she’s showing us alchemy, when the contrast is raised, creating tension, and from the tension comes rebirth.  seattle is usually vocal about her transformations.  feeling like seattle.  feeling spirits…feeling sentimental…