isn’t it funny? the life you want to be living, compared to the life you are living. that gap between the two.
partly you say, i am manifesting my dreams. and partly you say, be in the moment because now is enough. and c’mon, let’s face it, part of you also says, man, when is this gonna stop? or maybe not. it depends on who you are.
and isn’t that funny? how some people have more of what they want, than others. “more of what they want”. what does that mean? what does it mean to want?
that feeling of want is so luscious. it’s desire. sweet sticky caramel desire. root soil black desire. sunset red desire. swimming though turquoise water desire. i did that once. only once. some people do that a lot. some never make it to the turquoise waters….
investigate the thoughts behind the desires…and see the story of life you create….
the story is rich. meaning is necessary. it speaks to us as much as we speak to it. life is listening to us as much as we are listening to life.
everything is alive….everything.
and….this is a dream. you can feel it….
we all want romantic love because it reminds of the beauty of life, deeper than jobs and jogs and juggling our lives, and the lessons of family. we want to dive into the sky and forget that the table has four legs. we want to bite into the succulence and not count the grams, and move the seeds from one side to the other, waiting for the next season…
sometimes it’s best to let go of answers, equations, shapes and sizes. lose the boundaries. burn some moon smoke. float on fur. i dunno…
after reading for so many people the past few weeks, i feel and see and experience the beginning and endings of so many people’s cycles of life…..that i can feel how nothing ever stays the same, and find comfort in something not on the outside of life…not a person place or thing.
balance is important. what is balance?
isn’t it funny that focusing on balance can make you lose balance? i have to remind myself every three days to let go of structure, to make sure the structure remains strong…..
this week i have questioned everything about myself again. i do this every season. it’s predictable. self doubt looms. and so does the need to wash myself clean of myself. be like melting snow, as rumi wrote.
you can’t always make a bad feeling turn into a good feeling. and that’s ok. don’t have an aversion to aversion. acceptance should be never ending. accept your aversions. accept your attractions. accept the light and the shadow.
transformation happens only after balance is achieved. what it looks like, is no longer distinguishing good and bad within experiences, and because of this, the black and white contrast births into a spectrum of color…
we don’t know what it looks like yet. we are changing. growing. moving. becoming something new, something we’ve never been before. and don’t you forget it, cause it’s really beautiful and it’s home.
we belong to this feeling. it bridges the gap.